News... There are none.

So, a small break aaaand back I am.
Life is strange... A week has gone and nothing changed. I still feel like shit but whatever... Work is fine, a few strange days due to power loss, alarms going off, things like that. I bought two new Heinlein books and The Hitchhiker guide to the galaxy, a new laptop headset, afantasy sword for the photoshoot session with my friends, a few comics... Yes, shopping spree!!! And started playing DoMo, seems to be interesting so far, we'll see on the long run...
I want to travel!!!!!!! Meh.


So far, from my lair, it's all.
Thanks for the attention
TanCrow

Damn

I want to cry... I need to cry...

From u, coming kicks... (yes, it has a hidden meaning.)

Damn it... after months without hearing I come back from the bathroom and there she is, in the small little Google chat... "Care to talk?"

Did we? I mean, was that really talking? Or we just blablablaed about stuff? Did something change? Yeah right, thank you for being so sweet, were your facebook status aimed at me... and then what? Just wanted to know that? Could have kept your Mac shut for today then...
Oh I know, I wasn't really talking myself, but it wasn't me asking it.
Oh right "You know I'm not home anymore, don't you?"
No thanks, didn't know that! Didn't knew a damn thing about you since then. What you want me to? Ask where you are, what you are doing? WHY? Like, nothing happened? WHY?
I want to be like you guys, not expecting anything, not asking questions...
FUCK THAT SHIT! I do expect things, and get fucking hurt when they fail!
I don't ask because I DON'T FUCKING WANT TO BE HURT BY THE ANSWER!
Is that fucking difficult to get? Where are you, back there??? Good for you, that means I won't see you for maybe years GRRRRREEEEEEAT!!!
Well that's a nice thing to know, thanks a lot for popping out telling me!
You are somewhere else? Same as above.

I'd really like to know what the hell was that about.
But I'm not expecting to discover it.

Still dark

Back!

So V day is gone, not that I really cared about it. Ordinary day, as it has been for the last...22 years? (ok last year has not, only exception).
I have some good ideas for a new photoshoot, I'll need to get some stuff from the old Bay! Free shipping rocks!

So many things I'd like to do, but even having all this time doesn't make me do them! What's wrong with me?
I really don't know... I feel sometimes like I don't care about anything at all, then I got 1000 things in mind, but still I end up spending all my time on facebook or wandering around the web. And the worst thing is that I don't even enjoy it! I'm bored but I just hang there, like a fucking dork... Sheesh... I'm really a whiner, nothing ever satisfy me doesn't it?

Hey! Check the drawings in the last blog I added to my profile! Awesome stuff, whoever you are, if you did them, dude you are amazing!

I miss my sunshine. Love you.

So far, from my lair, it's all.
Thanks for the attention
TanCrow

◕‿◕

So yesterday I was deciding how to spend all my freetime at work. I looked up my shelves for something still unread, a few options came out, and the English copy of The cat who walks through walls, by Heinlein, was the one that won the competition. Just out of curiosity I read the first two, TWO pages. I had to put it down, one more, and I would have been reading all night. He's amazing. I have not been reading for months, I know, Im ashamed of myself too, and now a few of his lines have been able to bring me back to my oldest passion!

So now there I am, reading this first chapter and a situation occurs. And there I was all: "Wow, that it's pretty cool, I could actually use that base situation to evolve it in a different twisted way you won't imagine!"
Just the page after showed one of the character joking about their real situation and how would it be obvious and cliche if things ended up...: exactly how I have thought!
I was amazed! I mean, I love this author since reading his first book so I should not be surprised. But hell, he died many years ago, and he still is thousand years in front of me.
He's a damn genius! If there's such thing as an afterdeath, I guess he would be the first one I'd love to meet. And after him I would be satisfied!!!

All heil Heinlein!


Now I'm back to my book!



So far, from my lair, it's all.
Thanks for the attention
TanCrow

Round and round

Well. A good friend is leaving. Long time since I last saw him, more than a year... And this will probably the amount of time before we get to meet again...Hope not! Good luck mate! See you in Australia!

A cousin is comin over in June, from Canada. And a friend from Lousiana, if her bro get to be free from school in time! Lot of people traveling, I'd say!

Weird. It was me that one, before. Miss that!
Whatever, I'll just take what I get and keep going with the flow.
I miss my starshine too. It's hard without her light, knowing I probably won't see it anymore...

Today not really inspired, no drawing, no writing... The lazy me has won once again, but I feel hopeful for tomorrow!
So I wish you all a wonderful day, or night, and start to get ready to hop down the train.

Choir

This was my second choir lesson after a break of what... 3 years almost? And damn, FEELS GOOD. I love music, I love singing, and I love to know I'm part of something great! That's one of the good sides of my life lately. I'm back writing (not just this blog, also my short stories, I'll be' uploading the last one in a few day) and I love that too, I feel creative! And drawing too! Yeah yeah, way to spend my time at work, right??? =D
Today, at the same time I'm happy and more melanconic than any other day in the last while. I guess I'm entering my blue period... WOOOT (sarcmarc)


So far, from my lair, it's all.
Thanks for the attention
TanCrow

How to ruin a blog

Back on train, back with my thoughts. Back to the same question bugging me since a while. Why do I have to keep going? I wake up, I go to work, I come back home, I go to sleep. Sometime I get to change the routine, spending some time with my friends, and then back again. Still this has no meaning at all to me. Not that being unemployed was better, of course. At least now I'm a bit useful to society instead of being a lazy nerdish slug, and I can live with my parents without that guilty atmosphere permeating the air a few weeks ago. Still I keep on asking it myself. My social life is almost unexistant. I don't have a girlfriend, and never had (not counting a 2 months story that was done even before starting).
I'm in love since march 2008 with a woman that told me both that I would be the perfect one and that basically she doesn't want me to love her (if those two things could actually mean something together but hey, it's not me saying it!).
She was the only thing I cared about. And no, I'm not being the poor broken hearted guy, I'm just saying that I never liked life before, when she was there I was finally happy to see a day go, because I would have gotten to see her the one after. Because she made my life interesting when she entered it. And when she left it it went back as it was before, or worse, with the sensation that the only good thing was gone, and did not wan to ever come back. So what now. I'm not saying I want to suicide, that period is long gone. I simply don't care about my life, should someone say "You are going to die in a moment" my answer would be something like a plain "Ok".


I know, I'm being a whiner, but this was one of the reason I wanted this blog for. I do have friends, I'm thankful for that. Pretty much all my close relatives are alive, and I'm thankful for that too. But i've got noone I feel like saying this kind of thing, and they were getting heavy on my shoulders. Hopefully, next blog-posts have a lighter tone. At least the worse subject is alredy gone, now I can talk about something more interesting^^

Here I am

Well then! Here I am!

Once again I would add, since this should be like my... third? blog. I think so, at least I don't remember if I had more.
I just hope this will be different, since the reason I started it are.
Well I'm too, and also the things I want to share.
Basically I just want to feel free to talk, to say what I feel, what happens in my life.
I know a lot of people would not care, in real life too, so I just write it here, thinking someone will.
If not, whatever... I'll just have my chance to take something out of my chest, and since the other blog I had were related to my persona, I never really let out anything, too many people who knew me.
So this is one of the major thing. I'll talk about myself, but I'll never say who I am. I'll talk about my passions. I'll tak about what I hate and what happens in my life. But I won't go into details about myself, no pictures, no facebook details and stuff. Guess I'm just looking for some anonimity (is this the right word? don't know, if it isn't feel free to correct me, being of a mothertongue different from the english one, often I make mistakes)
Oh this is the other difference from before. I will write in english. One reason is because I actually prefer it over my native language. The second it's that I will improve my writing skills and of course by using it I won't unlearn what I know. Oh, and third, I'll have the chance to get a bigger audience! :P

So as said, here I am.
Can't tell how long I'll keep this going, neither how often I'll update.
So far, with the job I'm into right now, I guess I'll have plenty of time to write stuff, even more than is really needed (wait, do someone actually need this stuff from me??? WHATEVER XDDD) but since I don't know if my contract will last over february 22nd I just have to wait and see what future holds for me.

So far, from my lair, it's all.
Thanks for the attention
TanCrow